Sometimes I wonder if my life is just about attending the weddings of my friends or going to see their new borns for the first time. Or worse trying to remember the names of their spouses and babies.
But at other times, I wonder if my life is about having the freedom to go out for dinner or a movie with a guy friend or going to the pub for Wednesday Ladies Night out with my girl friends to enjoy free drinks.
As you must have guessed by now, I am in the better half of my 20's and SINGLE! You can't even imagine the pressure that comes with it. If I come back to office after a couple of days off or bring sweets to the office, people think I got engaged. And I dare not apply Mehendi (Henna) on my hands. The pressure gets tenfold when I visit my hometown and meet my relatives. Or worse if I attend a family wedding. "You are next in line". "Whats your age? Oh, you should get married now. When I was your age, I had 2 kids". On the outside, I can't do much more than smile but on the inside I am shouting "Can't you mind your own business???"
When I was a young girl, I was very fascinated by weddings. The new clothes, jewelery, makeup.. all that sounded so good. On Karvachauth, the Indian festival in which women pray for the long life of their husbands, I used to dress up just like my mom without realizing that it’s fun to dress like that once in a while but not every day, for the rest of your life.
In college, I was told "Concentrate on making your career". The underlying message was "Stay away from boys. Don't let them spoil your studies and future. And if you happen to find a guy, he should be of the same caste, with a good family background, be rich and have a great career." With all those specifications, all the guys I knew got filtered off.
I started with the more traditional approach, meeting the guys shortlisted by my parents. I had a few disaster dates. Some of the guys were mamma's boys and the others wanted a career woman who would party with them. But as soon as she steps inside the house, she should switch to the daughter-in-law avatar, and cook delicious dinner for his parents every day. It seemed like they were not looking for a life partner but the female version of superman.
So I decided to find the right guy on my own. I know it sounds a lot rosy. But it turned out to be much more difficult than I had expected. Come to think of it, the only guys I get to meet our software engineers like me and I thouht what a boring life it would be.. a software engineer marrying another software engineer. Or worse, a team member marrying a manager. Just imagine a lazy Saturday afternoon; the husband-cum-manager delegates all the work to me and I end up being a helpless team member following her boss’s orders even at home.
I feel there are so less avenues to look for the right guy. And I have tried most of them without any fruitful results - Dance Classes, Internet, Libraries and even Toastmasters Club.
Lately, I have been hooked onto the Sex and the City Series. But instead of New York City, I find myself walking on the lanes of Noida. And instead of turning around to check out cute guys, I hold my purse tightly and look for potential chain and purse snatchers on black pulsars. I hope like Carrie Bradshaw, I find my Mr. Big sometime soon! So if there are any single men out there, who think they fit the bill, you know where to find me. ;-)
P.S. Some of the characters and events in the speech are fictitious/exaggerated. I would like to believe I am not as desperate as I sound above :-)
But at other times, I wonder if my life is about having the freedom to go out for dinner or a movie with a guy friend or going to the pub for Wednesday Ladies Night out with my girl friends to enjoy free drinks.
As you must have guessed by now, I am in the better half of my 20's and SINGLE! You can't even imagine the pressure that comes with it. If I come back to office after a couple of days off or bring sweets to the office, people think I got engaged. And I dare not apply Mehendi (Henna) on my hands. The pressure gets tenfold when I visit my hometown and meet my relatives. Or worse if I attend a family wedding. "You are next in line". "Whats your age? Oh, you should get married now. When I was your age, I had 2 kids". On the outside, I can't do much more than smile but on the inside I am shouting "Can't you mind your own business???"
When I was a young girl, I was very fascinated by weddings. The new clothes, jewelery, makeup.. all that sounded so good. On Karvachauth, the Indian festival in which women pray for the long life of their husbands, I used to dress up just like my mom without realizing that it’s fun to dress like that once in a while but not every day, for the rest of your life.
In college, I was told "Concentrate on making your career". The underlying message was "Stay away from boys. Don't let them spoil your studies and future. And if you happen to find a guy, he should be of the same caste, with a good family background, be rich and have a great career." With all those specifications, all the guys I knew got filtered off.
I started with the more traditional approach, meeting the guys shortlisted by my parents. I had a few disaster dates. Some of the guys were mamma's boys and the others wanted a career woman who would party with them. But as soon as she steps inside the house, she should switch to the daughter-in-law avatar, and cook delicious dinner for his parents every day. It seemed like they were not looking for a life partner but the female version of superman.
So I decided to find the right guy on my own. I know it sounds a lot rosy. But it turned out to be much more difficult than I had expected. Come to think of it, the only guys I get to meet our software engineers like me and I thouht what a boring life it would be.. a software engineer marrying another software engineer. Or worse, a team member marrying a manager. Just imagine a lazy Saturday afternoon; the husband-cum-manager delegates all the work to me and I end up being a helpless team member following her boss’s orders even at home.
I feel there are so less avenues to look for the right guy. And I have tried most of them without any fruitful results - Dance Classes, Internet, Libraries and even Toastmasters Club.
Lately, I have been hooked onto the Sex and the City Series. But instead of New York City, I find myself walking on the lanes of Noida. And instead of turning around to check out cute guys, I hold my purse tightly and look for potential chain and purse snatchers on black pulsars. I hope like Carrie Bradshaw, I find my Mr. Big sometime soon! So if there are any single men out there, who think they fit the bill, you know where to find me. ;-)
P.S. Some of the characters and events in the speech are fictitious/exaggerated. I would like to believe I am not as desperate as I sound above :-)
